Starting the Journey Towards Reclaiming Life

Family, Mothering, Parenting

Written by Amber Parr Burdett

January 22, 2024

Starting the Journey Towards Reclaiming Life

Life inevitably takes our plans and throws them out the window. Navigating these unforeseen twists becomes an inherent part of raising a family, making us feel like we must forgo our goals and mental health to prioritize that of our family’s. I vividly recall moments when life took unexpected turns, disrupting my envisioned path.

Coping with challenges isn’t easy, but it’s a strength within me—and within each of us—that we don’t always know exists.

We enter into parenthood with preconceived notions and ideals. We envision a life where each day aligns with our meticulously planned path or perfect motherhood—even though we know perfection is impossible to truly reach.

But reality paints a different picture. Life’s twists and turns don’t adhere to our expectations. The more we try to steer life in the direction we believe it should go, the more resistance we face. And, rigidly clinging to plans that life deems can’t happen only breeds discontentment. By embracing the fluidity of reality and redefining aspirations, we can discover a newfound sense of purpose. It’s not about abandoning goals but rather redefining them to our ever-evolving selves. 

Self-compassion becomes pivotal. 

It’s easy to grapple with feelings of inadequacy every time we can’t comply with the demands of life and goals go awry. And, at the end of 2022, I was on the brink of a breakdown juggling the demands of mothering, part-time work, and feeling inadequate because my interests no longer felt important.

My world was caving in on me, and I didn’t know where to turn until my husband forced me to take time for myself. It was another battle to actually implement those carefully scheduled times when work, parenting, and adulting were off-limits—which meant I had to rediscover what I liked. But that is a whole different topic to be discussed at a later time.

This is about what I’m learning through taking time for myself: have self-compassion the same 

way you have compassion for your child. Practicing self-compassion lets us acknowledge that it’s okay not to have it all figured out. It’s about embracing imperfections and being kind to ourselves amidst setbacks. Self-compassion becomes the source of self-acceptance.

We Are Dynamic Beings

Shifting the lens through which I view expectations, goals, and plans is a transformative journey. Initially, success was tethered to rigid benchmarks I set for myself. But with time, I’m realizing that success isn’t confined to checkboxes on a list. It’s about evolving perspectives, finding contentment in the journey, and cherishing growth along the way.

Embracing change becomes synonymous with personal growth and self-discovery, inviting us to welcome life’s uncertainties as catalysts for transformation.

How to Untangle the Disruptions

Motherhood, goal-setting, and life’s unpredictability often tangle into an intricate journey as we move forward. Untangling life isn’t about abandoning dreams but allowing them to evolve organically. It’s in this ongoing journey of adaptation that we find resilience, purpose, and an unwavering belief in the beauty of life’s unpredictability.

Moving Forward

As we navigate life’s unpredictable terrain together, I extend an invitation to you: join in the conversation. Comment or email me (amber@burdett.us) your story, or share this blog with someone who might resonate with its message. Let’s foster a nurturing community where we celebrate our diverse journeys, learn from one another, and embrace life’s unpredictability as a catalyst for growth. Your story is valuable—let’s inspire and uplift each other as we navigate the beautiful chaos of motherhood and self-discovery.

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